Introduction

The last fourteen years. Why am I writing this? Actually today is 4th April 2009 and tomorrow is the death anniversary of my father. He died 14 years ago in the year 1995. It was the early morning at about 4.00 am. My mother came to our room in which I was sleeping along with my brother. By her shouting we suddenly woke up. My grandmother in another room also got awake. I was ignorant that my father will die soon. My father was suffering from throat cancer. His stage of cancer was advanced but we did not know when he will die. My brother knowed that how will he die, and seeing the stage in the morning he realized that. He immediately went outside shouting loudly. He called neighbours, friends and the doctor nearby.

My father died at about 4.30 in the morning. When my mother called us, it was bleeding from the wound. We used to wrap the wound with cotton and bandage, to protect from outside and also the pus coming out get absorbed. By seeing the bleeding, we prepared a bandage but it was of no help as the bleeding is in the last stage as whole blood from the body has come out. When the bleeding started my father realizing that awaked my mother sleeping beside. Then only mother came to know and called us. I imagine the senses of human, as my father was in extreme end of his life, did not talk or unable to talk or eat has awaked. It may be his wish to see all of us before dying or may he needed some help or suffering from extreme pain or has wished for us to see him for the last time.

After putting the bandage we took out the bed sheet soaked in blood and changed his wear. He was lying asked to make him sit on the bed. We make him sit and unable to retain the sitting position fell aside on the bed. I was confused as what to do. After that he did not asked for sitting again. He said he is feeling pain in the chest. Mother rubbed on his chest. Mother asked me to give him water. I was unaware then that giving water is a symbol that “dying people is given water”. I poured small quantity of water still not realized that he will die within few minutes. The doctor has come by then. The doctor seeing this, said that nothing could be done at Birnagar and he may be taken to Ranaghat, a town near our native place. But the astonishing fact is that on seeing the doctor my father recognised him and gestured to give him seat by placing his left palm on the bed twice.

I used to grasp his palm tightly with mine and he replied similarly by pressing my palm. May be before a minute of his dying, I had done so and he replied by pressing my palm. Today I feel the delight that even in the last second of ones life, the person live with full strength. Otherwise just before dying he would not have done that. After then he swallowed may be the remaining saliva and it was his last body movement.


Now the object of writing this is how the last 14 years passed without my parents (as my mother also died five months later).